TAG-02-03

I guess I should try to write something today. Since I am falling apart quickly it seems. The surgery went well yesterday. The surgeon came for his rounds late in the afternoon with the interns. I had thought after surgery that he had not done any work on my urethra because I didn’t find the belly catheter, but rather just the normal urethral one. Seeing that type of catheter I assumed he didn’t decide to work on it, but when he came for his rounds, he mentioned that he had shortened the urethra and reduced the swell bulb somewhat, and decided to try to use the urethral catheter with the disadvantage being extra bleeding.

I awoke in the recovery room at 9:50 am with an IV in my arm and a catheter in my urethra. They nurses in the recovery asked me if I had any pain, I replied yes, and immediately was administered pain medicine through the IV. I felt nice and relaxed, like I was floating. I was doing well without any nausea or any other complications, except for a bit of pressure in my bladder. I had been in surgery for an hour and a half roughly. This time they were relatively careful about the bandages that they used on my very sensitive skin. The anesthesiologist said afterwards that I needed a bit more than normal to keep me under, although I don’t remember a thing about it. He was a very nice man with good bedside manner and handsome to boot.

I find it weird that when the surgeon goes through on his rounds he tends to speak with his interns and not directly to me the patient, except to ask if I had any pain. When he started to discuss with the interns about what he had done with my genitals, I asked for his confirmation that he had shortened my urethra. He also told me that he did the mons pubis plastic and in the end, removed almost no tissue from my labia. He said that he had stretched them, distributing them evenly between top and bottom and therefore not needing to remove anything. I am anxious to see what he has done. I think I was a bit open at the bottom more than normal, and I wonder if it was from when I stupidly decided to climb stairs here in the hospital and ripped a stitch or two. I was hoping to see it today, but I still have a little bit of residual bleeding, I assume coming from the urethra. The doc said that was the price to pay for not having the belly catheter. I will see if it was worth it or not. I remember the belly catheter was no fun.

I slept most of the afternoon off and on because of the lasting effects of the anesthesia and the pain medication. It was so easy to drift in and out of sleep. I was supposed to get the normal lunch, but the nurse went to check to see if I was allowed to eat and probably got sidetracked and *poof* I went hungry. I slept a lot so I didn’t notice so much, until I awoke and the rest of my roommates were eating their dinner. I almost lost it, but then the nurse came and asked me if I wanted to eat dinner, to which I replied “affirmative”. They also still had my lunch somewhere and I had them heat it up and bring it to me. I ate both in one sitting.

Sleeping was not so easy and I drifted in and out. When I awoke I began to cry for no discernable reason. Day 3. I ate breakfast and felt a bit better and then checked email and read a bit. I started watching the film coralline and then my friend and work colleague Helmut came to visit with me. He brought me diverse fruits and juice and snacks. He stayed for a few hours which helped elevate my mood quite a bit. The whole time I had been also chatting and video calling with my sisters and the nun0 with skype.