Chrissy's river of action

My Blog is an outlet for my thoughts and feelings that would otherwise remain unexpressed.

Tuesday, October 05, 2010

opposition

I am compelled to write out of desperation.  It seems with every day that passes, I come to regret ever leaving Europe.  It was by far not a perfect place, but a place that I had the chance to be with my Love, legally and without impedance.  I do not feel like a US citizen anymore, because the values of this land could not be more opposed to mine.  The inalienable rights the founding fathers wrote of are bullshit.  My rights are limited by a stodgy right-wing undercurrent that is so full of double standards, they have forgotten what a pure standard is.

I am going to start working on finding my way back to Europe.  I don't plan on ever coming back.  I had a bad feeling about making this move, but I chose to ignore it.  We'll work it out, I told myself.  I wish it would, but in the end I think it will be just lots of wasted energy for naught.  It is difficult being here after being exposed to how things could be done better, not perfectly, but better.  Getting to know cultures that actually care enough about the future to plan for it, and make the necessary sacrifices for the betterment of generations to come.  Here we just think about ourselves, and who gives a flying F**k about tomorrow?  I am beginning not to care if tomorrow ever comes, in fact, I am near to hoping it doesn't.  That seems better to me.

I feel hopelessly lost at the moment, and so filled with regret that I am choking on my own bitterness.

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4 Comments:

  • At 7:10 PM, Blogger sweet trini said…

    email me, babes. i miss you and i feelin for you as you fight+struggle...walk good biglove

     
  • At 4:35 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Try this if you are feeling the impossible

    to St. Rita


    O Holy Patroness of those in need, St. Rita, whose pleadings before thy Divine Lord are almost irresistible, who for thy lavishness in granting favors hast been called the Advocate of the Hopeless and even of the Impossible; St. Rita, so humble, so pure, so mortified, so patient and of such compassionate love for thy Crucified Jesus that thou couldst obtain from Him whatsoever thou askest, on account of which all confidently have recourse to thee expecting, if not always relief, at least comfort; be propitious to our petition, showing thy power with God on behalf of thy suppliant; be lavish to us, as thou hast been in so many wonderful cases, for the greater glory of God, for the spreading of thine own devotion, and for the consolation of those who trust in thee.

    We promise, if our petition is granted, to glorify thee by making know thy favor, to bless and sing thy praises forever. Relying then upon thy merits and power before the Sacred Heart of Jesus, we pray thee grant that [here mention your request].

    By the singular merits of thy childhood,
    Obtain for us our request.
    By thy perfect union with the Divine Will,
    Obtain for us our request.
    By thy heroic sufferings during thy married life,
    Etc. {repeat Obtain for us our request after each line]
    By the consolation thou didst experience at the conversion of thy husband,
    By the sacrifice of thy children rather than see them grievously offend God,
    By the miraculous entrance into the convent,
    By thy severe penances and thrice daily bloody scourgings,
    By the suffering caused by the wound thou didst receive from the thorn of thy Crucified Savior,
    By the Divine love which consumed thy heart,
    By that remarkable devotion to the Blessed Sacrament,
    on which alone thou didst exist for four years,
    By the happiness with which thou didst part from thy trials to join thy Divine Spouse,
    By the perfect example thou gavest to people of every state of life.
    Pray for us, O holy St. Rita, that we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

    LET US PRAY.

    O God, Who in Thine infinite tenderness hast vouchsafed to regard the prayer of Thy servant, Blessed Rita, and dost grant to her supplication that which is impossible to human foresight, skill and efforts, in reward of her compassionate love and firm reliance on Thy promise, have pity on our adversity and succor us in our calamities, that the unbeliever may know Thou art the recompense of the humble, the defense of the helpless, and the strength of those who trust in Thee, through Jesus Christ, Our Lord. Amen.

     
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