Late Post
This is a post I started on the 5th about the week of 29-aug to 2-sep-2005. I finally finished it today.
I was a very busy person last week, and therefore did not publish the events. Monday night after work I spoke with KPo for an hour and a half on the phone. I hadn’t spoken with her for six weeks. Too long. Her father had called me the day before to chat. I hadn’t spoken with him since they dropped me off at the airport to come here. It was good to speak with them again, and I should make a point to call more often. In speaking with KPo for so long, I ended up being late to meet Mari, Christi, Helmut and the guys from Co. Scholle for dinner at La Bodega. They had only eaten a bunch of tapas and were finishing when I got there. The restaurant was closing at around midnight and some of us still wanted another beer. We decided to go around the corner to Cluster, a tiny little bar with great atmosphere. I had drank just about a full bottle of rijoha at the Spanish place and then proceeded to have three or four beers at Cluster. Big mistake. I was relatively blotto on the walk home. I went to bed at 2:45 am.
The next day I felt like I was going to or rather wanted to die. I have to try to stick to my guns when I start drinking one thing, to not mix it. My stomach was sour the whole day. Tuesday night I planned with Jens to go to his house for a small barbecue and disclosure about me and my situation. I felt a bit awkward at first because the dynamic between Jens and his wife Beate is not quite what I am used to. After dinner we chatted for a while and then they turned the attention to me. I hadn’t given any clues to them as to what I had to say. Heike had however spoken with Jens and told him to make sure he is sitting down when I tell him. I prefer to refer to my telling people about my transition as “disclosure” rather than “coming out”, as the latter is normally associated with homosexuality. I do relate with homosexuality on certain levels, but its all about perceptions to me.
The disclosure started off as I have been accustomed to. I usually start off with the question “do you know what gender dysphoria is?” The response to this initial question helps me gauge how to continue with either basic explanations or cutting to the chase. Coincidently, Beate was specialized in Gynecology and had worked at a clinic that treated many a trans frau. She even collaborated on a publication on the subject. So she was keenly aware of what I am up to. This fact helped to ease the situation, as Jens had only a basic understanding of gender dysphoria. Jens was mostly silent through the rest of the night, only asking a few questions. He did tell me that he is happy for me that I I know who I am and what I need to do to be myself. I think he was a little shocked, but also trying to understand. The next day at work was just like any other day. Another one down and many more to go. I’m thankful that this disclosure went well.
Wednesday I stayed home and went through my household and financial records looking for my Social Security and pension plan statements. I was supposed to send them to my financial advisor a couple of days ago. I have seriously started to think about investing and retirement. I have money sitting around that should be earning me more money. I am also buying lots of insurance. Like Litigation, accident, personal, and long term disability. I don’t like to take chances, and therefore want to be fully insured against possible physical and financial catastrophies.
Thursday I went to the Bayrischer Biergarten after work. Fredi had invited me as Meck, Anja, Walter, and Andreas were also coming. While I was on my way from the bike park to find them, I ran into the former president of my company, Manfred. I have been seeing him relatively often around town. When I found the table, Walter asked me if that was in fact Manfred. I told them it was. I had a couple of Hefes and then something to eat. Walter offered to buy a round and came back with the total wrong beers. He brought back two helles and a duenkel, but they weren’t hefeweizen. The duenkel was for me which are normally really sugar-y, and I don’t do well with sugar-y beers. I drank it to not waste good beer and went and got some of the right stuff. I stayed until the place closed with Walter and Anja. Walter kept trying to convince me to come work for the competition, which is where he works. I rode home with a pretty good buzz going.
Friday I felt like I wanted to or was going to die all over again. I really need to take it easy on my liver. My stomach has been getting really sour lately after drinking, not a pleasant feeling especially if I have to work. I finished the day out and planned on going home to relax and drink lots of water. I think it was the red herring, the duenkel bier, that did me in honestly.
So that was the missing week in review.
I was a very busy person last week, and therefore did not publish the events. Monday night after work I spoke with KPo for an hour and a half on the phone. I hadn’t spoken with her for six weeks. Too long. Her father had called me the day before to chat. I hadn’t spoken with him since they dropped me off at the airport to come here. It was good to speak with them again, and I should make a point to call more often. In speaking with KPo for so long, I ended up being late to meet Mari, Christi, Helmut and the guys from Co. Scholle for dinner at La Bodega. They had only eaten a bunch of tapas and were finishing when I got there. The restaurant was closing at around midnight and some of us still wanted another beer. We decided to go around the corner to Cluster, a tiny little bar with great atmosphere. I had drank just about a full bottle of rijoha at the Spanish place and then proceeded to have three or four beers at Cluster. Big mistake. I was relatively blotto on the walk home. I went to bed at 2:45 am.
The next day I felt like I was going to or rather wanted to die. I have to try to stick to my guns when I start drinking one thing, to not mix it. My stomach was sour the whole day. Tuesday night I planned with Jens to go to his house for a small barbecue and disclosure about me and my situation. I felt a bit awkward at first because the dynamic between Jens and his wife Beate is not quite what I am used to. After dinner we chatted for a while and then they turned the attention to me. I hadn’t given any clues to them as to what I had to say. Heike had however spoken with Jens and told him to make sure he is sitting down when I tell him. I prefer to refer to my telling people about my transition as “disclosure” rather than “coming out”, as the latter is normally associated with homosexuality. I do relate with homosexuality on certain levels, but its all about perceptions to me.
The disclosure started off as I have been accustomed to. I usually start off with the question “do you know what gender dysphoria is?” The response to this initial question helps me gauge how to continue with either basic explanations or cutting to the chase. Coincidently, Beate was specialized in Gynecology and had worked at a clinic that treated many a trans frau. She even collaborated on a publication on the subject. So she was keenly aware of what I am up to. This fact helped to ease the situation, as Jens had only a basic understanding of gender dysphoria. Jens was mostly silent through the rest of the night, only asking a few questions. He did tell me that he is happy for me that I I know who I am and what I need to do to be myself. I think he was a little shocked, but also trying to understand. The next day at work was just like any other day. Another one down and many more to go. I’m thankful that this disclosure went well.
Wednesday I stayed home and went through my household and financial records looking for my Social Security and pension plan statements. I was supposed to send them to my financial advisor a couple of days ago. I have seriously started to think about investing and retirement. I have money sitting around that should be earning me more money. I am also buying lots of insurance. Like Litigation, accident, personal, and long term disability. I don’t like to take chances, and therefore want to be fully insured against possible physical and financial catastrophies.
Thursday I went to the Bayrischer Biergarten after work. Fredi had invited me as Meck, Anja, Walter, and Andreas were also coming. While I was on my way from the bike park to find them, I ran into the former president of my company, Manfred. I have been seeing him relatively often around town. When I found the table, Walter asked me if that was in fact Manfred. I told them it was. I had a couple of Hefes and then something to eat. Walter offered to buy a round and came back with the total wrong beers. He brought back two helles and a duenkel, but they weren’t hefeweizen. The duenkel was for me which are normally really sugar-y, and I don’t do well with sugar-y beers. I drank it to not waste good beer and went and got some of the right stuff. I stayed until the place closed with Walter and Anja. Walter kept trying to convince me to come work for the competition, which is where he works. I rode home with a pretty good buzz going.
Friday I felt like I wanted to or was going to die all over again. I really need to take it easy on my liver. My stomach has been getting really sour lately after drinking, not a pleasant feeling especially if I have to work. I finished the day out and planned on going home to relax and drink lots of water. I think it was the red herring, the duenkel bier, that did me in honestly.
So that was the missing week in review.
posted by Christine Cormier @ 11:12 AM
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