Chrissy's river of action

My Blog is an outlet for my thoughts and feelings that would otherwise remain unexpressed.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

:::inspired:::

Have you ever met someone so right and completely wrong at the same time? I have, and she has become someone very special to me. We’ll call her n0.

I think it best if I write about how she makes me feel, and you will probably get a feel for her without me saying anything directly about her.

The title ::inspired:: means a lot to me. Inspired means sitting in a tiny old brown bar with a mind blowing assortment of bier listening to nice jazz. Inspired means taking long walks home in the middle of the night after a nice party. Inspired means being a freak surrounded by other freaks.

She has inspired me to think about things from a different perspective, in that I am reassessing what is really important to me and my future. I am finally able to see that my job is destroying my health and need to change that. She is helping me realize that being autonomous means taking constant responsibility for myself and my actions and how they affect the world around me. I am inspired to take an active roll in improving myself both mentally and physically, not for her, but for me. She has reminded me that I have to want to do things for myself and no one else. If I am happy because I am doing things for myself, she will be able to enjoy me being a happy person. Happy people are nice to be around.

She has inspired me to buy apples and bananas when I am hungry instead of burger king. I am slowly cutting animal products out my diet. I want to stop taking the statins for my cholesterol, and eating vegetarian will help with that. I am think I will finally stick with it this time. I think the only exception will be cheese and condensed milk for my coffee, maybe. There are many very yummy things that come from plants, like vanilla yofu and leberwurst.

She has inspired me to challenge myself to really take an active roll in determining my future and helped me find more energy where I didn’t know I had it to pursue my dreams and make them reality. She has helped me become more open to new and different ideas and challenge my preconceptions about many things. She is helping me to discover my own formula for personal peace and happiness.

She is helping me see that I am a strong woman and that I can and should be proud of what I have achieved. She is showing me that others see me as a beautiful person, in contrast to how I see myself. I am challenging myself to be as honest as possible, which is really not difficult at all. Communication is absolutely vital, and has been enlightening. We have discussed difficult things and were not always able to find solutions, but at least we try to explore possibilities that could lead to solutions.

I draw strength and inspiration to go further from within myself through her. I am inspired by her examples of how she lives and her life choices. I strive to be someday as strong as she is. But then again smell isn’t everything. Just kidding.

I am so thankful to have come to know her as I have. She truly is someone special. I want to shout her name from the rooftop. She has reminded me that I must love myself first before I can love her. I knew many of these things already, but somehow she is showing me how to turn thought into action. My relationship with her is a very uplifting experience for me.

It’s very refreshing to me to be in a situation where I am with someone and yet I am inspired to be more independent. I used to think that wasn’t possible, but now I see that it is and it is a beautiful experience. She is right; it is easier to come together when we are doing our own things. Where have you been all my life n0?

She is helping me rescue myself for and from myself.

This is just the beginning.

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